


Always

by Slytherin_Gal



Series: Confessions [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Always by Panic! At The Disco, DId you know Virgil's spider is a legit ao3 character?, Did you know AO3 has Virgil's spider as a legit character?, Disney, Disney Princesses - Freeform, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, It took a long time to remember this song yo, M/M, Magic, Magic Posters, Walking in on singing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 04:56:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17318498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slytherin_Gal/pseuds/Slytherin_Gal
Summary: Virgil finds comfort in music.Roman draws courage from said music.Y'all know what's gonna happen.





	Always

Roman sunk out after Virgil, meaning to head to the emo side's room. He was almost there, in fact, he could feel the slight warmth of the room. (Patton had made the room a slightly warmer temperature, after noticing how chilly it was the last time they visited. Virgil had blushed at the care.) However, Roman made a last minute detour to his own room, chickening out at the last moment. He was confronted with his own wall of Disney princess posters. They were charmed to give him advice based upon what the actual characters would say. Right now, they were all staring at him disappointedly. 

"What?" Roman asked the posters.

"I'll tell you what. You aren't giving yourself a chance. Whatever happened to the romantic Roman?" chastised Merida. 

"I'm still..romantic..." muttered Roman.

The princesses shared a look. 

Tiana sighed. "Roman, go for it. Achieve your dream."

Roman turned around. "But I've hurt him, I've been so cruel."

Belle spoke up. "Roman,  _chéri_ , turn around." Roman ducked his head as he slowly turned. Belle laughed kindly and continued, "Notice how those were in the past tense? Have you made an effort to improve?"

Roman looked up slightly. "Yeah...I think..."

"Then go for it," encouraged Rapunzel. 

"Go fight for him," said Mulan.

Roman smiled. "Thanks ladies." He turned to go.

"Wait!" cried Aurora. Roman looked back. "Take a rose," she advised.

Roman smirked. "A... _briar_  rose?"

The princesses laughed. "Off with you now," said Cinderella.

"As you wish, my ladies." Roman bowed dramatically. He exited rapidly, with a new courage and purpose.

 

* * *

 

Roman stood, a lavender rose in his hands. It paid off to be the representation of creativity, as he could procure everything he could come up with. It was a short walk to Virgil's room, but he saw the door was open and no one was inside. That was odd, Virgil usually could be found in his room. Roman checked the rest of the house and found no one there. He scanned the rest of the mindscape and felt a presence in the woods. Strange. Shrugging, he set out for the forest he had created for picnics and days out with his family. The forest was largely random, to keep authenticity, so even Roman didn't know the layout of it. He could remember the first time he had invited Virgil to the woods. He had found a really cool clearing and just  _had_  to share it with someone. But Patton and Logan were busy filming a video with Thomas. Upset, he accidentally summoned Virgil, then known as Anxiety, to him in his search for companionship.

* * *

 

_"What do you want, Princey?" Anxiety had asked, his hood up, looking to the ground, hunched. It was obvious he was nervous, and soemhow that made Roman feel...not good._

_Roman refused to admit he had made a mistake, so he took it and ran. All part of the show. Totally not to make Virgil feel worse.. "While I'd never think you could make good points, I did enjoy our little banter the other day. You know, about Disney?"_

_Anxiety looked up cautiously, though his posture remained hunched. "Um-uh-Thanks-I guess. I mean, way to give a backhanded compliment, but-uh-thanks. If that's all maybe I should-"_

_"Wait!" Roman cried. He tried to supress the little glow he felt inside his chest when Anxiety relaxed that little bit. He needed to show someone the clearing. "I..found something. In the woods."_

_Anxiety did a little half smirk that did something strange to that glow in Roman's chest. "Oh really, something in the woods? Color me surprised."_

_Roman rolled his eyes, "No need for the sarcasm, Gerard Gay, I found a clearing and I just...wanted to show someone."_

_Anxietys smirk grew. "Wow, hitting me on the sexuality. Goddamn, Princey. Anyone else would think you're hitting on me. And why would you want to show me the clearing?"_

_Roman stomped his foot, annoyance growing.(Not because Anxietys smile was cute, no. And he did not feel anything when Anxiety suggested Roman was flirting with him or when Anxiety basically said he was gay._) _"Because Patton and Logan are busy. Now, come on!"_

_Anxiety sighed. "Lead the way ,Your Highness."_

_They had a...pretty good afternoon that day. Roman spent his time collecting flowers and exploring the clearing. Anxiety found a comfortable spot by the little pond in the clearing, a little nook created by a couple big rocks, and listened to music. As the sun went down in the forest, which went on the same clock as the real world, Roman went to collect Anxiety, and he couldn't stop the quiet gasp that arose from what he saw. Anxiety had fallen asleep, his bangs somewhat out of his face. His body was relaxed, and his face was peaceful. Roman almost didn't want to wake him up. That glow in his chest grew and grew, until Roman started realizing what it was. Goddamnit. Roman tiptoed over to Anxiety and gently tapped his shoulder._

_"Hey", Roman whispered. Anxiety grunted but did not move. Roman tried again to similar results. The creative side sighed and gently picked Anxiety up bridal style. "Sorry.... friendo,"  Roman whispered. "I'd ask for your consent, but you're kinda asleep and I don't want to leave you here."  Anxiety was scarily light, and for some reason that made Roman ...sad.  Anxiety just snuggled into Roman's chest, and Roman tried to ignore his heart beating faster. Anxiety smelled like chamomile and chocolate, an absolutely delicious combination. Woah. Bad thoughts, Roman. He deposited the darker side in his room and practically sprinted to his own._ _Slamming the door behind him, he dramatically flopped down on his bed, groaning. He thought about what he had felt today, and he thought he recignized the symptoms. But it wasn't possible. There was no way. He draped an arm over his eyes dramatically. In the process, he smelled his sleeve. Chamomile and chocolate. Roman's clothes even smelled like Anxiety. And Roman wasn't sure how that made him feel._

_"Goddamnit," Roman said out loud. And then Patton called him for dinner, so he left to go downstairs. Hopefully, the emo nightmare would not be present. And with how deeply the anxious side was sleeping, Roman was almost fully sure that Anxiety would not come down. Banishing the strangely adorable(adorable? where did that come from?)  image of Anxiety sleeping from his head, Roman went downstairs. He wished he could say the whole exchange vanished from his head, but he would continue to think about it in the late, sleepless nights to come. And when he visited the clearing and found Virgil asleep, he may have carried the darker side back to his room._

* * *

 

Roman smiled at the memory. Well, if there was anywhere to check, it would be the clearing. It was twilight nearing night, and the stars were beginning to shine through the sky. The air was chilly and Roman shivered. As he got closer to the clearing, he heard a guitar being tuned. Did anyone in the mindscape play guitar? Suddenly, a few chords were played and a voice that could only be described as heavenly cut through the air.

_When the world gets too heavy_  
_Put it on my back_  
_I'll be your levy_  
_You are taking me apart_  
_Like bad glue_  
_On a get well card_

The voice touched Roman's very soul. Roman walked as quietly as he could to see Virgil in the clearing, sitting on one of his rocks, guitar in hand. Virgil was wearing his hoodie and black sweatpants, but was missing his headphones. His eyeshadow looked new, meaning he might have just reapplied. The look on Virgil's face was bittersweet, as if he couldn't decide whether he was happy or sad. In Roman's eyes, he was beautiful. Roman couldn't bring himself to interrupt as Vigil sang the chorus.

_It was always you_  
_Falling for me_  
_Now there's always time_  
_Calling for me_  
_I'm the light blinking at the end of the road_  
_Blink back, to let me know_

Virgil's eyes were thankfully closed, so Roman moved as quietly as he could to Virgil's nook. This way, he would be close to the side without being seen. He was almost caught as Virgil opened his eyes to continue the song, but Virgil didn't seem to notice Roman as he moved into the next verse.

_I'm a fly that's trapped_  
_In a web_  
_But I'm thinking that_  
_My spider's dead_  
_Lonely, lonely little life_  
_I could kid myself_  
_In thinking that I'm fine_

 

Roman looked at Virgil and saw tears gathering in the anxious side's eyes. Hot tears streamed down Roman's face. He wanted to hold Virgil, to tell Virgil it would be alright. For all he knew though, maybe Virgil loved Patton or Logan. That would make more sense, both in the song and logically. The spider being dead could be Virgil's chances with whichever of the two he loved. Anyway, when had Roman ever been nice to Virgil? Even if Virgil didn't love him though, Roman would help Virgil. He would make sure that Virgil always felt loved, even if it had to be platonic. Roman loved Virgil too much to see him sad. Virgil's voice cracked as he sang the chorus again.

 

_It was always you_  
_Falling for me_  
_Now there's always time_  
_Calling for me_  
_I'm the light blinking at the end of the road_  
_Blink back, to let me know_

 

By now the tears were streaming down Virgil's face. Oh, how Roman wanted to wipe those tears away, to cup Virgil's face and say that it would be alright, that he would find love. But he couldn't find the courage to speak up. Virgil's voice was hauntingly quiet as he sung the bridge of the song, getting softer with each word.

 

_That I'm skin and bone_  
_Just a king and rusty throne_  
_Oh, the castle's under siege_  
_But the sign outside says 'leave me alone'_

 

Virgil faded into silently crying. Tears drip, drip, dripped onto the guitair as Virgil's shoulders shook gently. Virgil was such a gentle creature. Roman had never felt so bad as he did in that instant for all the things that he had done. Roman wasn't sure what to do, so he did what he could do best. He sang.

 

_It was always you_  
_Falling for me_

 

 

Virgil looked down in surprise at Roman, whose eyes were pleading for Virgil to join him in song. At first Virgil tensed, and Roman died down. But then Virgil sang the next line.

  
_Now there's always time_  
_Calling for me_

 

 

Roman joined him in harmony for the rest of the song, filling in the echo at the end.

  
_I'm the light blinking at the end of the road_  
_Blink back, to let me know_  
_(It was always you)_  
_Blink back, to let me know_  
_(It was always you)_

 

The two looked at each other cautiously, then Roman climbed up to join Virgil, sitting on the anxious side's right. The two sat in an awkward silence for a moment, which Roman broke.

 

Roman looked at the ground. "You, uh, sing well."

 

Virgil laughed without any mirth. "Spare me the niceties. I know I sounded bad. Now, what brings you here?" As he spoke, Virgil started to shrink into himself, hunching forward into his classic pose. Roman hadn't even noticed how confident Virgil looked while singing, how the typically slouched side had straightened up.

 

Roman looked at Virgil. "First off," Roman began, "you sound better than me." Ignoring Virgil's snort, Roman coninued, "Second off, there's...something I need to say."

 

Virgil chanced a glance at Roman. The normally put together creative side looked like a mess. Tear tracks down his face, hair messed up, sash out of place, clothes mussed. "What do you have to say, Princey?" Virgil asked.

 

Roman hesitated. "Uh-uh-uh"

 

Virgil snorted. "Leave the anxiety to me Roman. You don't have to say anything. I know what you're going to say."

 

Roman startled. "You do?"

 

Virgil shrugged. "Yeah. I'm okay with the fact that you don't like me and never will. I value the friendship we have and-" He was cut off by Roman's hysterical laughter. Virgil glared at Roman. "What's so funny?"

 

Roman somehow forced out words through his laughs. "Y-you-thought-I-d-didn't li-like yo-you! I thou-though y-you di-didn't li-like m-me!" Tears streamed down Roman's face, as his laughter quickly turned into sobs. 

 

Virgil's face melted into concern as he put his arms around his friend. "Hey, hey, shush. It's fine. Why would I not like you? What's not to like? You help Thomas so much, you're an integral part of who he his, you have so many great ideas."

 

Roman shook his head. "But I hurt you," he whispered.

 

Virgil sighed. "Yeah. In the past, we were...not the best at interacting. But you've changed. You still got a bit more growing to do, but so do I, and so does Patton, and so does Logan, and so does Thomas. We all do." Virgil tightened his grip on Roman. "And though it may not seem like it, I'm always there for you."

 

Roman laughed through his tears. "Look at you being the hero. I'm the prince here."

 

That made Virgil crack a smile. A real smile, not just a smirk. "Well, I guess the roles have changed. So since I guess we've both cleared up a couple misunderstandings, what did you want to tell me?"

 

Roman blushed. "Um, um," he looked frantically around him for the rose. He spotted it in the nook. "Goddamnit. Wait one sec." He pulled out of Virgil's arms and jumped off the rock. He picked up the flower, put it between his teeth, and climbed back up the rock. It was slightly crushed, but it would have to do. Roman held the flower out to Virgil. "Virgil, I've grown so fond of you I don't have words to describe. And I wish I looked better as I told you what I'm going to tell you, because goddamn I look like a hot mess. But the thing is.....I....oh for the sake of all things Disney, I love you!"

 

Virgil froze. "What?" he asked quietly, looking away from Roman.

 

Roman realized he had been kind of loud and rambly. "Um...I...love you."

 

Virgil didn't move. 

 

Roman grew concerned. "Virgil, are-are you okay?"

 

Virgil turned around to face Roman, his face bright red. "Can I kiss you?" Virgil blurted, totally out of character. (shut up author we get its 12 am but its a fanfiction so hush)

 

Roman gaped. "Um uh sure yeah I g-" He was cut off with Virgil's mouth on his. It was a chaste kiss, Virgil's closed lips to Roman's quickly shut lips. But to Roman it felt like the best kiss in the world.

 

Virgil looked down. "I'm sorry. I'm fight or flight and fight took over and oh my god tht was probaly bad an-"

 

Roman cupped Virgil's face in his hands, cutting off the anxious side's ramblings. "It was amazing. May I have another?"

 

Virgil smiled softly. "You may."

 

And as they kissed, something in Thomas's mind clicked into place. Lying on his hotel bed, he knew his other otp had just gotten together.

 

"Wow, I'm really, really gay," Thomas giggled. "Like, even I don't know how this could be gayer. I wonder how the fans are gonna react to this?"

 

And while it cannot be said that it was all sunshine afterwards, it definitely can be said it was all ranbows.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Steaming pile of....i don't even know. I was listening to this song again, and you know...stuff happened. Characters got ooc, i got meta, all that good shit.
> 
> Comment below, roast me, whatever. I love talking to my fellow Fanders.


End file.
